Sunday, 13 August 2017

News Thump

Europe jealous of British weather
Other countries with their ‘heat waves’ and ‘horrifying 40-degree temperatures’ are secretly jealous of Britain’s steady August drizzle.
The revelation comes as nations across the world bake in high summer temperatures whilst gazing enviously at Britons grimly trudging through the horizontal rain.
Europe, which is sizzling in hot, sunny summer weather, actually yearns for some good, solid British downpours to break up the monotony of all that hot, hot sunshine and beach weather.
“It’s true,” admitted EU Weather Coordinator Simone Guilliames. “One thing we in Europe will lose with Brexit will be access to all those lovely, lovely overcast, chilly British summer afternoons.
“What we really fear is that when you sign trade deals with the rest of the world they will be able to make use of your delightful eight inches of rain in twenty-four hours whilst we are stuck with boring old sunny day after sunny day.”
“That would be hell,” she added.
NT

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