Tuesday, 6 June 2017

News Thump

snow, terrorism
Counter-terrorism raids on a flat in East London have revealed what Britons have feared most – that ISIS were preparing a ‘wrong type of snow’ attack on the capital.
Chemicals discovered at the flat were first thought to be for making bombs, but Metropolitan Police spokesperson Simon Williams revealed their true, chilling purpose at a press conference, confirming that the terrorists were planning to finally bring the city to its knees.
“London has lived through the Blitz and decades of IRA attacks,” said Williams.
“Our transport networks and passengers have been repeatedly targeted, and have repeatedly proved to be resilient.
“We thought that whatever they threw at us, London would keep calm and carry on.”
Williams then became visibly distressed before continuing.
“But no, not this. Not the wrong type of snow. They’ll destroy our civilisation as we know it.”
The raids also uncovered huge sacks full of what was first thought to be fertiliser for a truck-bomb, but turned out to contain leaves.
“We can only guess what those sick bastards were planning to do with these,” he said grimly.
NT

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