Wednesday, 8 February 2017

News Thump

A new study of voters in the EU referendum has shown a strong correlation between people who voted for Brexit, and people who ‘don’t read good’.
After assessing the localised breakdown of votes from nearly half of the local authorities which counted EU referendum ballots last June, researchers claim the results are ‘incontrovertible’.
“That means what were are saying is the truth – if you’re reading this in a Brexit area,” clarified lead researcher Simon Williams.
“However, this does not mean that everyone who voted Leave is stupid, and that everyone who voted Remain is clever – that would be absurd. My mate Dave voted to stay in the EU and he’s a borderline simpleton.
“It just means that if your academic career ended with a single GCSE in Food Technology, then you are far more likely to be a Brexiter.”
Experts say the findings will have a significant impact on the way future political campaigns are fought.
As one political analyst told us, “In any given election, if you can convince every voter of below average intelligence to vote for you, you will win by a landslide.
“A conclusion which I’m sure will do wonders for the quality of political discourse in this country – I can’t wait.”
NT

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