Monday, 30 January 2017

At Least SNN Recognise Spurs...

Tottenham Hotspur manager Mauricio Cappuccino has said that coming from behind to beat League 2 opposition WYCOMBE WANDERERS at home 4-3 was perhaps the ‘greatest achievement’ in the history of not only football, but also humankind in general. 
He added that a 10-DVD box set will be released ‘within days’ including an exclusive commentary from Jamie Redknapp and Vinny Samways. 
The Spurs boss said: ‘These League 2 sides can be tricky. To be fair their first two goals weren’t our fault – our defence was distracted by that gaping hole in the side of our stadium.’
‘We now have a difficult task ahead of us to make sure that a permanent memorial to the monumental fightback is put in place.’
‘As we speak, representatives of the club are in discussions with Haringey Council to construct an ‘Avenue of Heroes’ leading up to the new stadium.’
‘Every member of today’s starting line-up with be immortalised in a series of paving stones, and a statue of Son celebrating the late winner will be erected as a striking centrepiece.’
‘I believe that today’s victory will be the perfect springboard to not only this season’s Premier League title, but also our reinstatement to the Champions League.’
Lifelong Spurs fan Dave Minicab told our Chief Reporter that today’s victory was the happiest day of his entire life. 
He said: ‘This will silence all of those idiots who think that we have a one-man team. Today, we managed to almost royally fuck it up as an entire unit.’
‘If anything, they should just stop the FA Cup now and award it to us for our incredible endeavour. I can’t wait for the open top bus parade tomorrow.’

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