Thursday, 30 June 2016

C & H

Calvin and Hobbes

New Bills

A man holding the new denominations of banknotes
Belarusians are preparing for a major change in the way they handle money, with coins being brought back into circulation as part of a currency redenomination.
For years coins have been issued purely as collectors' items in Belarus, as rampant inflation has made small change redundant - the exchange rate currently stands at 20,000 roubles to the dollar. But from 1 July, existing banknotes will be replaced by a new mixture of coins and notes, all with much smaller denominations.

BBC

Well Said

Here's a tip to avoid death by celebrity: First off, get a life. They can't touch you if you're out doing something interesting.
Kent Nichols and Douglas SarineAsk a Ninja, Question 55, 10-03-07

How Clever is This?

David Squires on ... Iceland v England

From the original and larger strip at TG

I Forgot Too

Everybody forgot about Wimbledon this year, and at least that’s something, according to reports this afternoon.
The annual look-left, look-right festival has arrived with little to no fanfare following the enormous fetid mess that is Brexit, and the hilarious sight of England crashing out of the much more important sport of football.
“There’s tennis?” enquired Simon Williams. “I’ll be honest, I had completely forgotten about that. Maybe it’s because of the weather or the overall sense of doom dominating the news; I suppose neither of those put one in the mood for watching people dick about in tight shorts.”
“I’ll be honest, I had completely forgotten about that. Maybe it’s because of the weather or the overall sense of doom dominating the news; I suppose neither of those put one in the mood for watching people dick about in tight shorts.
“In an ideal world, you wouldn’t have told me and I would have remained in a state of ignorant bliss, but I guess that’s Brexit for you.
“Don’t look for a link, there isn’t one. I’m just still really upset.”
Elizabeth King, a traditional sports-widow, said, “tennis is usually a fairly low importance for my alpha-male husband, which means we watch it for at least two hours a day.
“But this year it’s not even registered in his brain that it’s happening; like the birthday of a distant relative or, in his case, my birthday.”
NT

It Works

Want to cheer yourself up after all the doom and gloom in the news with England leaving Europe in every way possible?

Watch the first Christmas "special" of TOWIE (Essex thing).

I have no idea where they find these fucktards but these Barbie dolls actually think they have something to offer society.  The level of ignorance and lack of any kind of social grace is hypnotically entrancing, as you just wait to hear what inane piece of life's observation they can offer next.  Imagine being as retarded as this lot?  No amount of money could ever tempt me to part with my self esteem or principles yet these morons seem to be queuing up to show the entire nation what imbeciles they are.

If there was ever a need for preventing inbreeding, this has to be the best advert for it.

Now I assume none of you are form Essex and if that doesn't make you feel glad to be alive, nowt will.

PS: I was mugged.  I thought these episodes were meant to be 20 minutes worth- this lasted closer to an hour.  Some gouge my eyes out.

DYK?

Team Eng-er-land have won only six (6) knockout matches in tournaments since 1966

The last occasion was 10 years ago against Ecuador.  Before that it was Denmark in 2002, Spain (on penalties) at Euro 96, Belgium and Cameroon in 1990 and Paraguay in 1986.

IotD

Waking up too early.

Stay in Bed

MF

It doesn't take deep pockets to treat yourself. Indulge in one of the following simple pleasures for an immediate mood boost.

1. SHAKE UP YOUR ROUTINE.

Even little changes can be very refreshing. Try taking a different route to work, meeting a friend at a new coffee shop, or listening to music you’ve never heard before. Cook something unusual for dinner. Give your senses something fun and unexpected to explore. 

2. START A "WARM FUZZIES" FILE.

The next time somebody says something encouraging or flattering about you, write it down. Did they say it in an email? Label the email “warm fuzzies” or something similar. Over time, you’ll amass a precious collection of personalized little boosts that you can pull up when you’re feeling down. 

3. TAKE A GOOD, LONG LOOK AT THE STARS.

There’s nothing like the night sky for a good dose of perspective. On a very clear night, you might be able to see hundreds or thousands of stars, each of them light years away. What you can’t see are the rest of the 400 billion stars in our galaxy, or the septillion (that’s 1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000) stars in the universe. We are, as they say, a speck on a speck on a speck. (Tip: If you can’t see the cosmos from your house, a stroll through NASA’sHubble Telescope image gallery ought to do it.)

4. ASSESS YOUR INTERNET DIET.

Your time and attention are limited resources. How are you spending them? Take a look at your social media accounts and the websites and apps you use. How do they make you feel? Are you following people or taking in content that brings you down? If so, are you getting anything out of it? If your feeds are full of pointless negativity, it may be time for a purge.

5. GET YOUR GIGGLE ON.

What makes you laugh the hardest? Maybe it’s your favorite cartoon or a comedy special. Maybe it’s your sister, or your next-door neighbor's dog, or cooking shows hosted by a foul-mouthed toddler. Whatever it is, seek it out. It only takes a few minutes of laughter to get the dopamine and endorphins flowing. 

6. GO FOR A STROLL.

The simple act of getting outside can do wonders for your outlook. Even a short jaunt offers a host of benefits: fresh air, a change of environment, an opportunity to move your body, exposure to nature (even if that’s just grass and fenced-in trees, it counts!), and the opportunity to see and interact with other people and animals.  

7. ZOOM IN ON THE GOOD THINGS.

Everybody’s got their something. Maybe you collect sneakers, or are a wizard with nail art. Maybe it’s cute algae, or crafting, or museums, or basketball. Start taking pictures of your favorite things at least once a day. You could share the photos on social media or keep them to yourself; the point is to take a closer look at the things that make you happy.

8. SNUGGLE SOMEBODY.

Cuddles are like some kind of wonder drug. Cozying up to someone you love (or a stuffed animal, or even a well-compensated stranger) can lower your blood pressure, reduce your stress levels, flood your body with happy-making hormones, and even boost your immune system. Having a bad day? There is no shame in asking someone you trust for a solid hug.

9. TAKE A 3-MINUTE BREAK.

By now you’ve almost definitely heard about the myriad benefits of mindfulness meditation. But you probably haven’t heard that even tiny doses can help refresh your system. Not sure where to start? Try apps and websites like Calm.com, which guide users through tiny meditation breaks and offer soothing sounds and images like thunderstorms and waves on the beach.

10. GET YOUR HANDS DIRTY.

Most of us spend many of our waking hours sitting at the computer, using our hands only for typing and clicking and our eyes for reading and watching. When’s the last time you baked a cake, or assembled a piece of furniture, or patched a bike tire? It doesn’t have to be complicated or hard. If you’re out of ideas or energy, just picking up a coloring book and pencils or petting a dog can send some good feelings from your fingers to your brain. 

11. CREATE A BAD-DAY BOX.

Sometimes when you’re feeling down it can be hard to figure out what would make you feel better. You can skip that step entirely by starting a bad-day box today. This is just a box (or tin or bucket) in which you put little things that bring you comfort or joy. That could be stickers or nail polish or miniature chocolate bars; it could be a mix CD you made for yourself, a friend’s phone number, or some really silly jokes. It could be a book of poetry or a slapstick comedy on DVD. Whatever does it for you, throw it in the box, and when the bad day comes, you’ll be ready.

Another Bonus Out of the Blue

We keep single bank accounts to cover our visa requirements and share the THB 800 000 annually.  I had no idea we were due an interest payment and was pleasantly surprised to find an extra £40 appear on the bottom line.  :o)

Rush

We finally got around to watching this last night and really enjoyed it.  I was never a big fan of F1 and remain this way but seeing the rivalry between Lauda and Hunt both on and off the track was compelling viewing.

A film is set in the mid 70s, this was another nice look back to a time when I was just old enough to remember the times.  I am glad we are a few decades ahead now though.

Wednesday, 29 June 2016

C & H

Calvin and Hobbes

Until Tomorrow

I can't seem to tear myself away from the news at the moment with the UK in a tailspin, it's like rubbernecking at a RTA.  I will be back tomorrow as I catch up on what is happening to England and its pals, so until then we'll bow out with C & H as usual.

True Dat

Hurting True Facts About Daily Life

Worse Than Awful

I watched the Team Eng-er-land game yesterday afternoon and I was gobsmacked at what I saw.  Devoid of any idea, skill or tactical nous, this team is nothing more than a huffing, puffing group of pansies who are scared of the ball.  It'll be a relief that they are flying back early.

I have no idea who the next manager will be, some predictably dull "yes" man but they should consider making all players wear long sleeved shirts to cover up they grotesque armful tattoos, insist they all have short back and sides hair cuts and they all wear black football boots.  And what is it with wearing socks over your knees?

I won't bang on today though as the head hurts and the papers are full of it, so if you want a witch hunt grab a red topped bog roll and fill your neon decked boots.

Tuesday Night Club

We would usually go out on a Tuesday back in the UK and last night fancied repeating that tradition.  It was a good choice as we met up with some old (and new) faces.  A fun night out but today it will be a much more relaxed day with the most energetic thing perhaps taking a dip in the pool.

Bon Voyage

Karen packs her bags to fly back to NZ later today to help prepare for her daughter's 21st birthday.  Hubby and dad Dean will join them in a fortnight's time.

That means he has two weeks on his own with us down the corridor.

We shall train him well.  :o)

If Only

After an ‘unprecedented’ amount of rain fell over the first two days of Wimbledon 2016, the official in charge of the tennis championships has confirmed that the remainder of men’s and ladies’ singles matches in the tournament will be played over a single set to avoid congestion in the later stages – it is hoped that they will be able to revert to the original format for the final in both competitions. According to Tournament Director Sir Henry Happo, this change has been in the pipeline for a number of years, with world tennis chiefs looking to emulate the success of the 20:20 format in Cricket.
Sir Henry said: ‘We have been considering reducing all Wimbledon matches to a single set for a while now, and it has now got to the stage where the amount of rain has effectively forced our hand on this issue. Single-set tennis showdowns have the potential to revolutionise tennis as a spectator sport in the same way that 20:20 cricket has made full one-day internationals almost irrelevant, and reducing schedule congestion will avoid the need to run those terribly inconvenient ‘People’s Sundays’ where we can’t charge spectators to get in. If a men’s match goes to five sets, it can last for up to four or five hours and our research has shown us that people simply cannot keep their concentration for that long.’
He added: ‘Having matches over a single set is a great idea in terms of spectator churn as well as it will allow more and more people to get in and see a game. At the moment, a huge number of people queue in the pouring rain so that they can sit on a hill and watch a huge TV in the pouring rain, and this exciting new format will mean that they have a better chance of getting into a court than ever before. We did also consider building a giant canvas roof that covers the whole complex, but our surveyor confirmed that the resulting drainage run-off could destroy large areas of Merton.’
SNN

Cameron's Latest

 

Warrior Poets,

 

This morning the Content Marketing Institute featured me in an interview. It's short, but they covered a few of the topics I care so deeply about.

 
P.S. "Man Box" is complete. I sent it to publishers and will keep you posted.
 
Read the interview

Tuesday, 28 June 2016

C & H

Calvin and Hobbes

Bad Rep

Summer television changed forever in 1988, when Shark Week made its Discovery Channel debut. This week it’s back, for its 29th annual edition, with a host of new specials, returning host Eli Roth, and a new state-of-the-art virtual reality feature. Take a bite out of these 10 facts aboutShark Week.

1. RUMOR HAS IT THAT THE IDEA FOR SHARK WEEK WAS CONCEIVED AT A BAR. (WHICH MAY VERY WELL BE A RUMOR.)

In discussing how the idea for Shark Week came about, former executive producer Brooke Runnette told The Atlantic that “the idea was definitely scribbled down on the back of a cocktail napkin.” She explained that a group of Discovery Channel executives had gotten together for a “post-work brainstorming session” over drinks. "As I've heard it, they were just talking about what kinds of things would be fun to do on Discovery. And one of them said something like, 'You know what would be awesome? Shark Week!' And somebody in that nexus scribbled it down on a napkin.”
In 2014, former Discovery Channel group president Eileen O'Neill corrected this story, telling The Week: "It started with a scheduler and the founder of the company, John Hendricks, brainstorming. They started with the premise that sharks are such predatory beasts, and rated well, and thought, 'What if [we] took advantage of the August beach time?'"

2. THE VERY FIRST SHARK WEEK NEARLY DOUBLED DISCOVERY’S RATINGS.

Shark Week made its debut on July 17, 1988 with the special Caged in Fear. A total of 10 shark-themed shows aired that year over the course of the inaugural Shark Week, which was an immediate hit. The channel’s ratings nearly doubled their normal primetime average.

3. IT’S GOT A LOT OF CELEBRITY FANS.


Shark Week has become a highly anticipated television obsession for viewers around the world, including more than a few A-list names. Tracy Morgan’s 30 Rock character, Tracy Jordan, famously advised Kenneth the Page to “live every week like it’s Shark Week.” In 2010, Stephen Colbert called Shark Week “one of the two holiest of holidays.” Over the years, several other celebrities have expressed their love of Shark Week.

4. PETER BENCHLEY WAS ITS FIRST HOST.

In 1994, an emcee was added to the Shark Week proceedings. Appropriately, Jaws author Peter Benchley—whose beloved novel was celebrating its 20th anniversary—became the first-ever host of Shark Week. In the years since, MythBusters stars Adam Savage and Jamie Hyneman,Dirty Jobs host Mike Rowe, comedian/late night host Craig Ferguson, and former SNL star Andy Samberg have all filled the role. Modern master of horror Eli Roth (writer-director of Cabin Feverand Hostel) is returning as the face of this year’s Shark Week.

5. SHARK WEEK WENT LIVE IN 1999.


In 1999, journalist Forrest Sawyer took Shark Week fans on a live underwater excursion of the Bikini Atoll, with camerawork courtesy of award-winning underwater cinematographer Al Giddings (The AbyssTitanic), for a two-hour special titled Live from a Shark Cage.

6. IT MADE SCIENTIFIC HISTORY.

In 2001, Shark Week premiered Air Jaws: Sharks of South Africa. The program—which is the fourth most-watched Shark Week special of all time—captured the first-ever footage of great white sharks jumping out of the water, in some cases launching themselves as high as 15 feet in the air.

7. IT HOLDS A CABLE TELEVISION RECORD.

In 2010, Shark Week became the longest-running cable television programming event—and it shows no signs of slowing down. This year marks its 29th annual event.

8. IT’S NOT JUST ABOUT ENTERTAINMENT; IT’S ABOUT CONSERVATION, TOO.

According to a release from Discovery Channel, “It is estimated that as many as 70 million sharks are killed annually, either for sport, caught as by-catch, or hunted for their fins in a wasteful practice called shark finning, in which the shark's fins are cut off at sea and the rest of the (live) shark is often tossed overboard where it ultimately drowns.” While Shark Week is meant to both entertain and educate viewers, Discovery Channel has also teamed up with Oceana, the world’s largest ocean conservation nonprofit, to help raise awareness about the dangers facing today’s sharks, and encourage donations to the organization. The channel also runs anti-finning PSAs throughout the week.

9. ONE YOUNG FAN MADE A BIG DIFFERENCE.

In 2014, Sean Lesniak—a 9-year-old Shark Week fanatic from Massachusetts—was so moved by a special on the declining shark population that he wrote a letter to his local representative, David M. Nangle, asking him to help put an end to shark finning. Nangle agreed with Lesniak's stance and pushed a bill forward to ban the trade of shark fins in Massachusetts. On July 24, 2014, then-governor Deval Patrick signed the bill into law.

10. VIRTUAL REALITY WILL PLAY A PART IN THIS YEAR’S PROGRAMMING.

This year’s Shark Week will feature a virtual reality component: Discovery Channel will bring viewers one step closer to experiencing all the shark action via the DiscoveryVR app.
MF

Help to Hand

Leave voters have been receiving text messages from l’ambulance-chasing companies asking to contact them if they’ve been mis-sold a life outside the EU.
Leave voter Simon Williams says, “This morning I got a text asking if I’d been missold a life outside the EU and informing me I may be entitled to compensation.
“This is probably the best news I’ve had since I was really, really happy on Friday morning, before becoming really, really depressed by about lunchtime.”
Eleanor Gay, a spokesperson for PPI company Cash4EU said, “As soon as we realised what was happening, we stopped pestering everyone about PPI, as those amounts pale in comparison compared to this.
“Besides, it was diminishing returns now and there can’t be anyone left who hasn’t by now sorted out their PPI liability.
“We estimate 17,410,742 people may be entitled to this EU mis-selling compensation. If they’re not sure how they voted, I would urge them to get in touch with us right away.
“This could cost the governments billions of pounds that they haven’t got already, due to the upcoming recession.
“A recession which is going to hit the pockets of the traditional ‘Leave’ voter very hard, so I would get in your claim now!”
Davey Bobrow was one of the first to claim under the scheme and has already received compensation, “Last week, the government said it wouldn’t uphold my complaint. But with Cash4EU’s help, it has now offered me Spanish citizenship!”
NT

Match Report

For Roy Hodgson it was a desperate and ignominious way to end his four years asEngland manager. Whatever else happened in that time, his period in office will probably always be remembered for the full-on humiliation that accompanied this defeat and the knowledge it will rank among the more infamous results in the history of the national team.
How can it be thought of any differently when the suffering came against a country with a population roughly the size of his home town of Croydon and absolutely no history of tournament football? What heroes Iceland were: brave, organised, superb. They have established themselves as the greatest story of Euro 2016 and it feels almost like a trick of the imagination that it is only four years since they were ranked 133rd in the world. That, however, will not lessen the embarrassment for England, their departing manager and a set of players who chronically under-performed after Wayne Rooney’s early penalty.
Iceland played with courage, skill and togetherness and might also fancy their chances against France in Sunday’s quarter-final. England, in stark contrast, dramatically lost their way once their lead had been wiped out and Hodgson resigned because he knew there was absolutely no way his contract would be renewed. England will have another manager for the next World Cup, Hodgson’s reign will be defined by a result comparable to losing to the United States in the 1950 World Cup and the now-familiar inquest will begin again in a country that likes to see itself as football royalty.
And so it fizzled to its close with Gary Cahill galloping around as an extra centre-forward, mutinous chants of “you’re not fit to wear the shirt,” from the England followers and Hodgson’s media staff announcing he would not take any questions. Joe Hart held up an arm apologetically towards the supporters. Mostly the players were on their knees. Some hid their faces in the turf and, once again, questions will have to be asked about what stifles them in England’s colours. How could it possibly be, just for starters, that Harry Kane finished last season as the Premier League’s leading scorer but played so badly? Kane did more than anyone to provoke the crowd’s dissent with his overhit passes and misdirected shots.
England certainly had the personnel to save themselves after that wild 15-minute spell in the first half when Iceland – little, patronised Iceland – scored twice to turn the game upside down. This, however, was a dismal night for Rooney, Daniel Sturridge and particularly Kane. Raheem Sterling won the penalty that gave England their early lead but did little otherwise to justify his recall and, defensively, it must have been startling for Hodgson to see the way they capitulated.
Iceland’s first goal came from one of Aron Gunnarsson’s long throws and precisely the kind of routine that, according to Hodgson, had been uppermost in England’s thoughts during their training sessions. The second was another reminder that the modern-day England side simply do not have the outstanding centre-backs of previous tournaments. It was also, once again, a personal ordeal for the increasingly accident-prone Hart.
England’s goalkeeper may bellow the words to the national anthem more vigorously than any of his team-mates but in the rather more important issues he has become a danger to his own side.
Hart’s mistake when Kolbeinn Sigthorsson scored Iceland’s second goal was not quite as wretched as the one he let in from Gareth Bale in the Wales match but, to put it kindly, it was another shot he should have kept out. Hart’s carelessness has become a recurring theme. No team can be this generous at the back and expect to get away with it.
All of which seemed nothing short of remarkable bearing in mind that only three minutes had elapsed when Sturridge’s curling pass sent Sterling running into the penalty area and Iceland’s goalkeeper, Hannes Halldorsson, brought him down to give away a penalty. Rooney aimed the ball, low and hard, to the goalkeeper’s right and at that stage England’s supporters might have been lulled into thinking this was an evening when their team would win with something to spare.
Instead the equaliser arrived within two minutes and was bordering on tragicomedy given that it was the first time Gunnarsson had hurled in the ball from the touchline. England, Hodgson had told us, knew all about this trick and would be drilled to guard against it. Yet it was difficult to see any hard evidence. One Icelandic centre-half flicked the ball on, the second ran in and applied the final touch. Rooney had been beaten by Kari Arnason for the first header and Kyle Walker was even more culpable in the way he failed to cover Ragnar Sigurdsson’s run into the six-yard area.
Iceland’s second goal followed in the 18th minute and, in fairness to Hart, he was not the only one at fault. Cahill and Chris Smalling both stood off as Gylfi Sigurdsson, Jon Dadi Bodvarsson and Sigthorsson exchanged passes on the edge of the penalty area. Sigthorsson moved in between England’s centre-halves, took aim with his right foot and Hart was diving to his left, just as he did for the Bale goal, when he helped the ball into the net.
England were rattled and, by half-time, starting to look a little desperate. Rooney could be seen slashing wildly at a volley that needed control. Dele Alli resorted to diving to try to win a penalty. Passes were misplaced and, though England did threaten to get behind their opponents, Iceland did not simply retreat once they were ahead. They gave everything to protect their lead but when they had the chance to go forward this tough, obdurate side did so with confidence.
By that stage Hodgson had brought on Jamie Vardy in place of Sterling. Jack Wilshere had already come on at half-time, replacing Eric Dier, and Marcus Rashford was introduced in the 85th minute. What a statistic it is that Rashford completed more dribbles – three – in that time than any other England player throughout the match. Hodgson had taken off Rooney when it surely made better sense to remove a defender. None of it worked and England will never live it down.One moment typified England’s inadequacies midway through the second half. England had a free-kick 40 yards out and Kane insisted on shooting from an almost implausible distance, aiming his effort harmlessly wide and, again, attracting voluble dissent from the fans packed behind the goal.

Viz Bits

Screen Shot 2016-04-30 at 10.17.48

Well Said


You wake me up early in the morning to tell me I am right? Please wait until I am wrong.
Johann von Neumannon being phoned at 10:00 AM
US (Hungarian-born) computer scientist, mathematician (1903 - 1957) 

Blame Them Now

Mail needs new scapegoat
After the UK voted to leave the EU thanks to years of its anti-immigrant headlines, the Daily Mail has begun the search for a new scapegoat on which to blame the country’s ills.
There are fears inside Daily Mail headquarters that further use of immigrants in fear-mongering headlines will cause readers to ask “haven’t we already fixed that problem?”.
As such, a new scapegoat is needed, and the unemployed have seen their odds slashed over the last 24 hours.
With the unemployed now at 2-1, benefit claimants are at 5-1 with ‘brown people’ a healthy outsider at 16-1.
Bookmaker Simon Williams said, “You might think Muslims would be favourite, but that would mean the Daily Mail having to explain that leaving the EU has nothing to do with Muslims, which would kind of undermine their whole referendum position, so I think that’s unlikely.”
Those inside the Daily Mail seem delighted at the prospect of the unemployed becoming their new scapegoat.
As one Daily Mail insider explained, “With the unemployed, we can recycle many of our top hits – which is good for the environment, even though the environment is a well-known liberal conspiracy.
“Headlines such as ‘Immigrant family of eight has house and car paid for by you!’ can easily be adapted by changing ‘Immigrant’ for ‘Workshy benefit scrounger’.
“We also think this one has long-term potential, as we’re unlikely to see a referendum allows us to get rid of the unemployed and those on benefits.
“It would be nice, but I just don’t see it – not for a few years, anyway.”
NT

Addicted

To the 70s show- we are now on series 5 and watched 6 episodes back to back until silly o'clock this morning.

Credit

We use a prepaid "Rabbit" card on the BTS and being German and a Virgo to boot, I always make sure I carry enough credit on my card to complete any journey.

I was fascinated to learn however, that if you do not have enough cash on your card they will still allow you though and you go into negative credit.

We didn't find out by how much, presumably not over THB 50/£1 as this is how much it costs to buy a new card, but good to know anyway.

Stick it In

On the underground (which runs north to south- the Sky Train runs mostly east to west) you have to pay separately and they use a token system.

It's always busy and queues appear at the automated barrier and I picked a line that had some bint on her mobile holding things up.  She was more concerned at her conversation than clearing the fuck out and allowing the bottleneck to dissipate.

Being in Thailand, no one was inclined to make a fuss but I have no such debilitating traits and politely suggested she open the barrier to allow the fast growing jam to pass through.

Of course she dropped her token.  Twice.

Then it wouldn't work.

I had by this stage given up and jumped into the next line, safe in the knowledge no one would comment at my queue jumping.  They are after all, far too polite.

Unlike the Farang who felt it was fine to continue to talk on the phone while she waited for station staff to sort out her mess.

A Change in Pace

Went off to Rama 9/Tower Plaza looking for a generic remote control for the TV.  In the end I picked one up from Tesco-Lotus for just THB 200- £4.

It's a bit busier than I wanted but it works a treat.

Good Piece

If we are on song and play to our top level, we can overcome our bogey team.  I am already getting nervous but we can win.  I just hope we do.

Germany enjoyed their first step into the serious rounds of Euro 2016, even describing their 3-0 defeat of Slovakia as “fun”. But they must all know that the fun is about to stop when they play Italy on Saturday. 
For the last few years Germany had suffered with the same problem that afflicted Spain when the rest of the world realised how good they were: no space. The most exciting displays in the early years of Joachim Loew’s Germany side were against England and Argentina in the 2010 World Cup, two sides who were complacent enough to give them room to attack into.
Germany scored four goals each time. Their greatest night, the 7-1, came against a Brazil side with no serious thought of defending whatsoever. Saturday will be the polar opposite of that.
So on Sunday night in Lille when Germany played a Slovakia side whose plan was to sit in, contain and frustrate, it felt like it might be another long night of defence against attack. As it was for England against Slovakia six days before. But Germany responded with the best football display of the tournament before, routing Slovakia with a 3-0 win that did very little justice to their dominance or, crucially, the number of chances they created.
Germany are far better for having Mario Gomez up front rather than Mario Gotze, and the Besiktas man has given this side an incisive power that they lacked before. Gomez scored once against Slovakia, won a penalty which Mesut Ozil missed, and looked like a man who was loving playing with Ozil, Julian Draxler, Toni Kroos and the rest. 
That is why Gomez said it was “fun”, and that is certainly what it looked like as they tore through a team who were powerless to stop them. “Against a team who played very defensively, there with five or six men, and just against them we did a really great job,” Gomez said. “We had so many chances, we had a lot of movement, we had a lot of flexibility. So for today, we can be happy, but we know that the rest of the tournament will be much more tough.”
But tough is what this side wants. They are World Champions and so far their three victories – Ukraine, Northern Ireland and Slovakia – have not been against the best. That is why Joachim Loew was so reluctant to talk up his team’s chances on Sunday night. What the want is a real test and that is what they will get against Italy in Bordeaux on Saturday evening. “Of course we prefer to play the stronger teams,” said Jerome Boateng. “It is more fun and you want to play against the best.”
Germany will have felt slightly anxious watching Italy yesterday afternoon, as Antonio Conte’s side put in a display of counter-attacking ruthlessness to beat Spain at the Stade de France. Germany have a slight complex about Italy: four years ago Mario Balotelli’s two goals knocked them out of the semi-final of Euro 2012.
This Italy team may not have as many names as that side did but they are stronger defensively and tactically, and have the best coach. They are the test that this Germany side needs to assert themselves as they want as Europe’s finest. 
TInd

Hodgson Speaks- We Comment

"Now is the time for someone else to oversee the progress of a hungry and extremely talented group of players. They have done fantastically, and done everything asked of them."

How can "talented" belong in the same sentence containing reference to Team Eng-er-land?  An over-sized oxymoron.

"They have done everything asked of them"?

Who the hell asked them to bollocks up a game that they should have cake-walked?  Iceland, a population of 330 000 people with part time managers and trainers beating Team Eng-er-land after going 0 - 1 down on the first five minutes?

It seems the wrong things were asked of the "lads".

“I'm actually proud of the work my coaching staff and I have achieved over our time at the helm of England."

Why? You have achieved nothing but shame and humiliation and under your charge have only won three games in qualified tournament finals.

"being the youngest in the tournament is both remarkable and exciting for the future of English football.

What is exciting about always losing in the first game of the knock outs?  What is exciting about a 0 - 0 draw with Slovakia?

"These players love to play for their country and their commitment has been unquestioned.”

I wonder which game Hodgson was watching last night?

BBC and TInd

IotD

"Team" Eng-er-land.

Stepping Down

How can you resign from a post that you know expires as soon as you are beaten in the tournament?

We were all aware that Hodgson was only in charge for the Euros and if he could have taken Team Eng-er-land into the semis, his contract may have been re-newed.

As soon as the final whistle blew in last night's debacle, he was already out of a job- so how can he say he resigned?

Speaking of stepping down, isn't it time for the FA's board, responsible for extending Roy's tenure after failing miserably in Brazil (2014) also fuck off?  Clearly the rot starts at the top and they are also responsible for this fiasco.

Worse Than 1950

All the headlines say this latest defeat compares to Team Eng-er-land being beaten by America in the 1950 World Cup.  I suggest it is worse as at that time England had never won anything, ever, and at least their opponents had a bigger pool of players to select from than the number of residents in Coventry.

Leaving the EU

To all the doom and gloom merchants concerned it would take at least two years to leave Europe.  Fear not as we have the ideal candidate in Roy Hodgson- he has guaranteed a complete withdrawal in just 90 minutes.

Good News

We're not going to meet Team Eng-er-land in the semis.  :o)

Bad News

It's Germany vs Italy on Saturday.  We're doomed.  :-(

Monday, 27 June 2016

C & H

Calvin and Hobbes

What You Wanted

i100

Just some of the truthy flights of fancy that won't be coming true any time soon include:

1. We aren't going to see a fall in immigration levels

No one in the Leave campaign actually gave any target figures, at any time, ever. Conservative MEP Dan Hannan has already said this morning that people expecting immigration to come down will be "disappointed".

2. We aren't going to have an extra £100 million a week for the NHS

Nigel Farage has already told reporters today that the Leave campaign shouldn't have claimed that.

3. We aren't going to be able to stay in the single market

No other country has a set up like that: both France and Germany have made it abundantly clear that we are not going to be able to have our cake and eat it, ie, take advantage of the free-trade zone without contributing a single penny to it, as Leave says we will.

4. We aren't going to get our sovereignty back

Looks like we're going to get a new prime minister by the end of the autumn Conservative party conference. It'll be a short list of two people, nominated by MPs.

This unelected leader could then theoretically hold office unopposed until a general election has to be called in three year's time.

P.S. We still have the House of Lords. So there's that.

5. We aren't going to save £350m a week

The Leave claim that the UK gives £350m a week to the EU has been thoroughly debunked. But it was still emblazoned on their battle bus right up until the end:




Follow

Graham Smith @graysmith100


@johnredwood admits on R4 that @vote leave battle bus claim is "gross" #EUref #brexit
1:39 PM - 9 Jun 2016

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6. We won't remain a world leader in research and development

UK investment in science and universities has dried up since the recession, whereas the EU gave us £7bn in science funding alone between 2007 - 2013.

We're also going to face new barriers to collaboration with European universities and research centres.

7. We aren't going to save £2bn on energy bills

Leave promised we could end VAT on household energy bills. While that's possible, it won't save us any money in reality because we rely on imports for so much of our energy.

Because the pound has fallen, inflation will go up, which means imports and thus our domestic energy bills will cost up to 12 per cent more than they currently do.

8. We aren't going to be a 'greater' Britain

Overnight the UK economy has already slumped from the fifth largest in the world to sixth.

More than £200 billion has already been wiped from the value of the UK stock market - or put another way, 24 years' worth of UK contributions to the EU.

DYK?

A lump of butter buried for 2 000 years in an Irish bog can remain edible.

Team Eng-er-land vs Iceland

Presumably the Brits will now want to leave the 2016 Euro tournament now?

Extra Happy

Reports are coming in from across the country suggesting that since the vote to leave the EU, everything has got much, much better.
“It’s about the control mainly,” said Simon Williams, a lid tightener from Glossop.
“We’ve taken all this control back, and I, for one, bloody love it; the control, I mean. I’ve just spent the weekend just sitting around trying to decide what I’m going to do with all this control we’ve taken back.
“It’s brilliant.”
Some reported that they were already enjoying the lack of interference from Europe.
“Yeah, because, right, I voted out because I don’t want the French telling me what to do,” said a lady who couldn’t remember her own name.
“It’s worked too, because, right, since Friday morning there has been literally no French person who has told me what to do.
“So, they can f**k right off with their baguettes and that.”
Others, however, were taking more practical steps.
Eleanor Gay, a lettuce moistener from Hartlepool, has knocked down her garage and plans to knock down her conservatory after lunch.
“Well, I voted out to strengthen our borders, and I’m not sure of the technical details, but I reckon they’re going to need loads of bricks, so I thought I’d donate some.”
Although everything is definitely better now, experts are suggesting everything will be even better in a few years when everyone has a brand new hospital at the bottom of their road and literally no-one is unemployed because no one has come over here and took their jobs.
NT