Thursday, 26 November 2015
The latest version of British computer Raspberry Pi has become the first computer to be given away free with a magazine.
The Pi Zero is a fully fledged computer which measures just 6.5cm by 3cm. Made in Wales, it sells for just £4 in the UK and $5 in the US. Raspberry Pi is also giving the device away for free with the purchase of its £5.99 monthly magazine, MagPi.More at TG
Since when has $5 equated to £4, especially as transports costs from Wales to England are far less than to the States?
Yet another prime example of "Rip Off Britain"...
Because nothing says Thanksgiving more than cigarettes, beer, and dishes with too much mayonnaise.
Cigarettes—as much a Thanksgiving tradition as turkey and all the trimmings (not to mention, they're great digestion aids)! (Source)
The "surprise" is that anyone would eat this to begin with. (Source)
We long for the days of food as kitchy art. (Source)
Russian Premier Vladimir Putin has issued a worryingly ambiguous statement that he’ll be having Turkey for Christmas.
Reporters were left asking precisely what he meant as Putin went into great detail about how he would wring it’s neck and carve the Turkey into tiny, tiny pieces in time for Christmas Day.
He will then proceed to devour the Turkey over the following few days, he said, before picking over the bones and leftovers over the subsequent week.
“It’s the big, strutting Turkey which waddles around pecking at others in the coop and thinking it rules the roost, but is in fact ripe for plucking,” said Putin, ominously.
“As my mother once told me; if you wish to pluck the bird, it is easier if you first cut off the head.
“I’m really looking forward to filleting it as part of my festive celebrations.”
Putin went on to add further uncertainty when he said that he expected some ‘loud bangs’ as he pulled crackers over the Turkey, but didn’t expect there would be any gifts or jokes.
The Russian foreign ministry was not much more help when they described Putin’s holiday plans as “exciting for the rest of the world to watch and filled with fireworks.”
French President Francois Hollander, who is visiting Putin today, is taking a gift of sauces and pickles in the hope of convincing him to stick to dinner.NT
Shadow Chancellor John McDonnell is to follow-up his hilarious Little Red Book stunt with some classic slapstick comedy for his next Commons appearance.
“I think it’s important that, in these difficult times, Her Majesty’s opposition is on hand to give everyone a good laugh,” said the wacky socialist.
“Jeremy’s been doing his best with that appointment of Ken Livingstone and having a silly beard, but we all need to help out, so I thought I’d get involved with this bonkers Mighty Boosh-esque reference to Chairman Mao’s Little Red Book.
“But I am very aware that we need to broaden our appeal. A Chairman Mao reference is going to make the trendy political elite laugh, but I want to have the whole population laughing.
“And what’s going to make everyone laugh more than a pie to the face?”
It is also expected that Mr McDonnell will arrive for his next Commons appearance in a clown car, the wheels of which will fall off as it comes to a halt. As he exits the car, his trousers will fall down before he trips over a small dog.
Pleasingly for the zany trade-unionist, it seems many Tories already find him hilarious.
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything that funny,” said one.
“Well, not since that woman cried on Question Time about her Tax credits. I mean, I thought I’d burst.”NT
Any woman who doesn’t want children is automatically worse than Hitler, says an mob made up of fucking morons.
The mob, which has been gathering online under the name “Your Uterus, Our Business,” has been gaining traction over the last week by writing all in caps, yelling incoherently and getting really sweary.
“It’s a fucking disgrace,” head pitchfork wielder William Limpdick spat.
“A woman’s decision not to reproduce affects everybody. What am I supposed to tell my children? That some people don’t think they’re the centre of the universe? I want my kids to have healthy self esteem, thank you very much.”
Mob member Gemma Judgey said: “No, reproductive decisions are not private and personal ones, because they directly affect how validated I feel by society.
“If a woman doesn’t want kids, she’s basically saying that I should have drowned mine at birth, and that’s unacceptable.
“Maybe the world is overpopulated, under-resourced and full of wars, disease and Justin Bieber, but not having a child is still the most selfish thing I can think of.”
In a public statement, Your Uterus, Our Business revealed that it will be lobbying the government to introduce a spare womb tax.
“An unused womb is a waste of anatomy, and we don’t see why childless women should be allowed to strut around with their fancy jobs, disposable income and vomit-free clothes at the taxpayer’s expense.
“We don’t care how many people they employ, or how much they contribute to the so-called economy, they’re a drain on society.”
“Now who wants to see pictures of our kids?”NT
Flo Perry / BuzzFeed
You’re hungover enough so that you’re not bored out of your mind by watching reruns of Masterchef all day, but not so hungover you have to make any sudden dashes to the toilet. You had a great time last night, and you don’t have anything to do today. These are the most blissful of hangovers.
Flo Perry / BuzzFeed
Often experienced the day after a think-you-might-die. You were so looking forward to this morning when you’d finally feel like you again, and then you didn’t. But you know you deserve this: You did a bad thing and drank way, way too much and this is the price you have to pay. But anyone who thinks you’re going to be making pleasant conversation today can do one.