Sunday, 1 February 2015

C & H

Calvin and Hobbes

Cost of a Coffee

Waitrose free coffee
Middle-class supermarket chain Waitrose has withdrawn its offer to give anyone a free coffee in a move experts have called ‘so predictable it’s actually painful’.
In an email to customers Waitrose said it was disappointed that people had not adhered to the well-understood supermarket etiquette expected of its patrons.
Consumer Simon Williams told us, “What Waitrose seems to have forgotten that the public is essentially a selfish, etiquette-free amorphous sack of shit.”
“If you say you’re going to give a free coffee to anyone who comes through your door, then you’re going to get people coming through your door just for the free coffee.”
“You have to remember that people will debase themselves buying The Sun every day in order to get a token to have a chance of getting something free – this was a stone-cold absolutely guaranteed freebie.”
“I’m just amazed that it lasted this long.”

Waitrose free coffee withdrawn

A Waitrose spokesperson said that the reaction to the offer of a free coffee had surprised them.
They told us, “We thought if we offered people a free coffee, they would come in, then see our produce and spend at least £150 on Organic Quinoa, Mojito Chicken Cigarellos and Madagascan Vanilla Ice Cream.”
“It turns out these ‘people’ just wanted the free coffee and to sit in our coffee shop for hours on end breathing our air.”
“Who knew?”
NT

A Fair Point

Dirty Humor 10 Gotta love that dirty dirty humor (41 Photos)

Hear, Hear

Well said Mr Fry- let's have more outspoken commentary such as this.

Appearing on Irish television programme The Meaning of Life, Fry was quizzed by host Gay Byrne as to what he would say to God if he were to exist.
Fry responded:
‘I’ll say, ‘Bone cancer in children? What’s that about? How dare you! How dare you create a world in which there is such suffering that is not our fault? It’s not right, it’s utterly, utterly evil. Why should I respect a capricious, mean-minded, stupid god, who creates a world which is so full of injustice and pain?
That’s what I would say.’
He was then quizzed as to whether he believed his views would prevent him from entering heaven, but defiantly said he would not want to enter heaven under the terms of a god who is ‘quite clearly a maniac, utter maniac’.
‘No, but I wouldn’t want to, I wouldn’t want to get in on his terms. They’re wrong.
Now if I died and it was Pluto, Hades, and if it was the 12 Greek gods, then I would have more truck with it.
Because the Greeks didn’t pretend not to be human in their appetites, and their capriciousness, and in their unreasonableness. They didn’t present themselves as being all-seeing, all-wise, all-kind, all-beneficent.
Because the god who created this universe, if it was created by a god, is quite clearly a maniac, utter maniac, totally selfish. We have to spend our life on our knees thanking him? What kind of God would do that? Yes, the world is very splendid, but it also has in it insects whose whole life cycle is to burrow into the eyes of children and make them blind. They eat outwards from the eyes.
Why? Why did you do that to us? You could easily have made a creation in which that didn’t exist. It is simply not acceptable.
So, you know, Atheism is not just about not believing there is a God, but on the assumption that there is one, what kind of God is it?
It is perfectly apparent that he is monstrous, utterly monstrous, and deserves no respect whatsoever.
The moment you banish him, your life becomes simpler, purer, cleaner, and more worth living in my opinion.’

Metro

Old v New

Who needs 19 reasons?  I suggest just one- The Jungle Book.  'Nuff said.

Frozen is the best Disney movie of all time? Give me a break, it’s time to Let It Go.
While the adventures of Elsa and Olaf running about in the snow in crisp 3D CGI goodness was all pretty and fresh, the likes of Frozen, Brave, Tangled et al have nothing on the charm of the old Disney favourites.
Aladdin and Jasmine on a carpet ride, Simba and Scar’s fiery battle atop Pride Rock and Ariel the mermaid combing her hair with a fork; these moments will always be better than two sisters wanting to build a snowman.
Here’s why the new Disney movies can’t match up to the old ones.
1. Animals are cuter than humans and therefore I will always root for them more. Who wants realistic flawed humans when you can have a saucer eyed baby lion? And it’s a talking lion at that.
19 reasons why classic Disney is better than modern Disney
2) The messages were simpler. I get the girl power thing and that ambition should be about way more than finding a Prince Charming. But Disney is escapism, not documentary. Snow White being whisked away by her dream hunk is the best kind of ending a Disney can have.
3) Alan Menken and his soundtracks. The urgency of Belle being chased by wolves, of Aladdin escaping from the lava filling Cave of Wonders and Quasimodo’s battle in Paris with evil Frollo were twenty times more epic with those classic Disney instrumentals.
4) Less of the CGI. I like my movies hand drawn, thanks.
5) Frozen might have a talking snowman. But Beauty and the Beast has an amorous, French candlestick. No contest.
19 reasons why classic Disney is better than modern Disney
6) The villains were ever so British back then. The dulcet, sleazy, evil tones of Scar, Jafar and Frollo set the ‘this guy is evil personified’ klaxon chiming from the outset.
7) The lessons were still important back then. Aladdin taught us not to lie about who we are, Bambi created a whole generation of vegetarians (how can you eat venison after THAT!?) and Ariel put ginger hair on the map.
8) The heroes were not zeros. Hercules took down mythical creatures left, right and centre and the hero prince slaughtered the terrifying Maleficent-dragon in Sleeping Beauty without breaking a sweat. Get stuck in there lads!
9) I don’t care how many comedy characters you force down our throats with irritating voices and foibles – NO ONE WILL EVER BE FUNNIER THAN THE GENIE.
19 reasons why classic Disney is better than modern Disney
10) The underdog stories are best and old Disney showed us that you don’t have to have rippling good looks to win the heart of a woman. Step forward a gigantic Beast, man of the jungle Tarzan and less than picture perfect Quasimodo.
11) OK, so Idina Menzel sang Let it Go. So what? Phil Collins sang You’ll Be In My Heart and Elton John sang Circle Of Life. Old Disney wins.
12) The distinctive voices kept cropping up. The Sheriff of Nottingham in Robin Hood was also one of the dogs in Fox and The Hound. Baloo the Bear was also Little John, the bear in Robin Hood. And that recurring Disney villain Pete went on to voice Razoul, the guard who constantly chased Aladdin through Agrabah. Disney veterans, we salute you!
13) The fuzzy nostalgic feeling you get when you watch Snow White, Dumbo, The Lion King and Beauty and the Beast can’t be replicated by modern Disney. Frozen just leaves me cold.
19 reasons why classic Disney is better than modern Disney
14) Disney could actually be scary. Maleficent petrified the living daylights out of me and that battle with Ursula at sea in the Little Mermaid was true hide-behind-the-cushion fodder.
15) Disney made Shakespeare and Dickens fun. A dog with sausages around his neck making friends with a cat in Oliver and Company was the best Charles Dickens rendition possible. And the Lion King ripped Hamlet off so it actually sounded like a play I wanted to study.
16) James Woods as Hades = the best cartoon voiceover ever. This is not up for discussion.
17) Action sequences were heart-stopping. Frollo burning down villages in Paris, Gaston plunging a knife into the Beast, Bambi’s mum being shot (er yeah sorry, SPOILER)…they had a big emotional impact. Olaf being flattened by a Golem isn’t a real disaster. He can always be rebuilt.
18) I like fairytales. I like princesses and glass slippers and magic spells being broken by love and princes riding upon horseback. It’s cheesy, it’s unrealistic, it’s DISNEY.
19) The balance. It has been so long since a Disney film has provided a warm story, tinged with sad moments, a horrifyingly evil villain, excitement, a beautiful romance and humour…but that combination is what made the franchise so special.
Get back to basics Disney and bring us those classic stories back.
19 reasons why classic Disney is better than modern Disney
Metro

Frozed [sic] Innit?

Weather forecasters claim the North of England is being threatened by an enormous snowbastard, on what is thought to be the most hyperbolic day of the winter so far.
“This is literally the most terrifying example of a snowbastard we’ve ever seen in the history of the world,” said forecaster Carole Kirkwood.
The snowbastard follows a winter of thundersnow, and snowmageddon, and could lead to a total weathertwat if the levels of hyperbole we’ve already seen this winter continue.
“Yes, a weathertwat, that would be a tremendously exciting weather event.” said Ms Kirkwood
“If we had a full on weathertwat, then the whole country would be under red, yellow, black, orange, purple and polka-dot weather warnings.”

Weather warnings

We asked for advice for the public in the event of these multi-coloured weather warnings.
We were told, “I don’t know, wear a hat?”
Even before a snowbastard or weathertwat, this winter was shaping up to be one of the most hyperbolic in history.
“Oh, yes, you’d have to go back to the great Snowfucker of ’91 to top it,” said weather hyperbole expert Simon Williams.
“The hyperbole surrounding the great snowfucker of ’91 was so great that Wincey Willis literally soiled herself live on air.”
We managed to track down a weather expert who could describe the nature of a snowbastard without resorting to hyperbole.
They said, “Snow on the hills and really quite chilly.”
NT

DYK?

did-you-know-1275

Equality

Iceland's main neo-pagan religion is to build its first temple in the capital, Reykjavik, it's reported.
The Asatru movement, which seeks inspiration in Iceland's pre-Christian Norse beliefs, says this will be the first pagan temple to be built in the country for 1,000 years. Work is due to begin in March at a site in the Oskjuhlid district, a popular woodland area that already hosts the landmark Perlan building, Morgunbladid newspaper reports.
The 350-sq-m (3,800-sq-ft) building will take the form of a half-buried dome, aligned with the path of the Sun. Architect Magnus Jensson has incorporated the mathematical 'golden ratio' in his design, as well as the numbers nine and 432,000 - which are sacred to the Asatru rite and other pagan religions.
Reykjavik City Council has donated the site, but the Asatru Association will raise the $975,000 (£645,000) building costs itself. The Association has 24,000 members, out of an overall population of about 326,000. Asatru High Chieftain Hilmar Orn Hilmarsson, a noted composer, says the temple will be used to celebrate weddings, naming ceremonies and funerals, and should accommodate 250 people at a time.
BBC

Unthinkable

Man removed USB before ejecting
There has been widespread shock and condemnation of a man who removed a memory stick from a USB port without first ejecting it.
The man – Simon Williams, is thought to have removed the memory stick at approximately 3pm on Monday at Whitmore and Whitmore’s consultancy in Bracknell.
“It was just so out of character, you know?” said co-worker Serena Greene.
“He was in a hurry, he’d copied something on to it. I saw what he was going to do, and I was all ‘No, Si don’t do it!’ but he just pulled it out anyway.”
Whitmore and Whitmore’s Office Manager – Julian Doyle takes up the story.
“The whole office went silent, Si was just standing there staring at the memory stick. I think he was in shock.”
“I don’t know, I guess instinct just kicked in, I got everyone to stand back. I mean, who knew what was going to happen? I got Si to put the memory stick down and walk away.”
“I mean, I’m just grateful no one got hurt.”
Official advice is to always eject a memory stick before removing it.
“It was shockingly reckless behaviour,” said Chief Inspector Mark Hammond
“He put himself, and his colleagues at risk, and some of those people had kids.”
“I mean, what next? Turning off his PC with the power button instead of shutting it down?”
NT

Filums for Feb- 9




Gett: The Trial of Viviane Amsalem

Israeli siblings Ronit and Shlomi Elkabetz end their trilogy of films about an Israeli family with a courtroom drama that has moments of bitter comedy. Ronit stars as Viviane, first seen in To Take a Wife (2004) yearning to leave her marriage of 20 years; in the follow-up Seven Days (2008) she was separated from husband Elisha (Simon Abkarian). Now, the Orthodox Jewish woman struggles to get a divorce from Elisha in a religious court. The film reflects the difficulties faced by women in Israel seeking to end their marriages: divorce in the country is granted by rabbinical judges and in this case, the process takes five long years. It first screened at Cannes, where Variety praised it for a “beautifully modulated script, ripe with moments of liberating humour” which “builds to a crescendo of indignation, allowing Elkabetz several cathartic outbursts, but they’re no more riveting than the actress’ silences”. Released 21 January in the US, 19 February in Greece and 20 February in Poland.

Filums for Feb- 8


1971

Its tagline claims “before Watergate, Wikileaks and Edward Snowden, there was Media, Pennsylvania” – and despite focusing on the year 1971, this documentary raises parallels with recent events. Executive produced by Laura Poitras – whose Snowden feature Citizenfour has been nominated for an Oscar for best documentary – 1971 tells the story of eight citizens who broke into an FBI office in Pennsylvania. Calling themselves the Citizens’ Commission to Investigate the FBI, they took every file, posting them anonymously to newsrooms around the US (one of the revelations – an illegal surveillance program overseen by FBI director J Edgar Hoover – bears eerie similarities to the leaks of 2014). Despite a five-year manhunt, they were never found. Director Laura Hamilton now tells their story through interviews with five members of the group, archive footage and re-enactments of the heist – fans of the film include Michael Moore, who organised a worldwide screening in 2014. Released 6 February in the US.

Filums for Feb- 7


Predestination

Ethan Hawke – nominated for a best supporting actor Oscar for his role in Boyhood – sheds the Linklater indie charm to become a ‘Temporal Agent’ in this mind-bending time-travel story. Co-starring Sarah Snook and Noah Taylor and directed by German-born Australian duo the Spierig brothers, the film takes in multiple worlds and shifting identities.The New Yorker called it “a brisk, twisty, and atmospheric science-fiction thriller that piques the imagination and the senses with the low-rent exuberance of fifties drive-in classics”. Released 5 February in Germany, 19 February in Brazil and 28 February in Japan.

Filums for Feb- 6


The Second Best Exotic Marigold Hotel

Director John Madden and writer Ol Parker follow up their 2011 sleeper hit The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel with a comedy-drama starring many of the same cast. Seasoned thesps Judi Dench, Maggie Smith, Bill Nighy and Celia Imrie are joined by Richard Gere and Tamsin Greig for the sequel, which updates the tale of a group of British retirees living out their golden years in the Indian city of Jaipur. In its review of the original movie, Variety made the point that “there’s an interesting parallel between the way companies outsource customer care to call centres in India and the way seniors are forced to retire to developing nations where their money will go further”. Released 26 February in Australia, Ireland and New Zealand.

Filums for Feb- 5


Kingsman: The Secret Service

Matthew Vaughn (Kick-Ass) chose Colin Firth to play a cold-hearted killer in his latest film – a surprising decision that Firth explained to the BBC with the words: “He cast me because he thought I was the least likely person on the planet to be doing this sort of thing.” It appears to have paid off. Kingsman has garnered rave reviews, with Forbes suggesting that “Fox may have a new franchise on its hands with this witty and occasionally spectacular homage to 1970’s-era James Bond adventures.” Based on a comic book, the smart action movie tells the story of a spy organisation that turns a street kid into a smooth operative, refreshing a genre in the process. Released 5 February in New Zealand, 11 February in Egypt and 12 February in Russia.

Filums for Feb- 4


Wild Tales

Nominated for the Foreign Language Film Oscar, Wild Tales brings together six tales of vengeance offering plenty of laughs alongside a healthy body count. Argentine writer and director Damian Szifrón injects elements of the surreal into his dark comedy: according to BBC Culture’s Christian Blauvelt, “One story presents nuptials that become a kind of Dalí-esque hostage situation. And the five other shorts are every bit as explosive, offering snapshots of people whose behaviour is pushed to the extreme.” Released 20 February in the US and 27 February in Finland and Sweden.

Filums for Feb- 3


The Voices

Ryan Reynolds, Gemma Arterton, Anna Kendrick – and a talking cat. An evil talking cat, to be precise, countered by a benevolent talking dog. Directed by Marjane Satrapi (Persepolis) and written by Michael R Perry (Paranormal Activity 2), The Voices mashes together tones and genres in a comic portrayal of a mentally ill factory worker. According to The Playlist: “Normally homicide and hilarity do not mix especially well, but The Voices ... manages to do exactly that in a way where both the tension and the grisly laughs are in perfect synch.” Released 6 February in India and the US, 12 February in the Netherlands and 26 February in Portugal.

Filums for Feb- 2


Fifty Shades of Grey

Anticipation for the screen adaptation of EL James’s bestselling erotic novel is being whipped to fever pitch: its star Dakota Johnson was photographed by Mario Testino for the cover of this month’s Vogue andits trailer has become Universal’s most-viewed teaser ever. The tale of the twisted affair between Anastasia Steele (Johnson) and sadistic CEO Christian Grey (Jamie Dornan) is directed by Turner Prize-nominee Sam Taylor-Johnson (Nowhere Boy), who has described it as “a very dark Grimm’s fairy tale, told for adults”. Released 11 February in France, 12 February in Brazil and 13 February in the US.

Filums for Feb- 1


Jupiter Ascending

Originally slated for release in the summer of 2014, the latest from Andy and Lana Wachowski (The Matrix) was pushed back to allow them time to complete “more than 2,000 special effects shots”. The delay prompted questions over the studio’s lack of confidence – but that might just be a sign that the film bucks straightforward blockbuster formula, with a story that sees Mila Kunis starring “as a sort of cosmic Snow White alongside Channing Tatum as a man-wolf space bounty hunter”. The space opera aims big: cast member Douglas Booth has described it as “a cross between Star Wars and The Matrix”. Released 5 February in Argentina, 6 February in Malaysia and 19 February in Australia.

Dilbert

Too Much Exposition - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Not So Easy As...


alphabetOften considered one of the more difficult languages to master thanks to the incredible amount of inconsistencies in the language, it should come as no surprise that the development of the modern English alphabet involved several languages, hundreds of years and a variety of conquers, missionaries and scholars.
Origins of Alphabetic Writing
Dating back nearly four thousand years, early alphabetic writing, as opposed to other early forms of writing like cuneiform (which employed the use of different wedge shapes) or hieroglyphics (which primarily used pictographic symbols), relied on simple lines to represent spoken sounds. Scholars attribute its origin to a little known Proto-Sinatic, Semitic form of writing developed in Egypt between 1800 and 1900 BC.
Building on this ancient foundation, the first widely used alphabet was developed by the Phoenicians about seven hundred years later. Consisting of 22 letters, all consonants, this Semitic language became used throughout the Mediterranean, including in the Levant, the Iberian peninsula, North Africa and southern Europe.
The Greeks built on the Phoenician alphabet by adding vowels sometime around 750 BC. Considered the first true alphabet, it was later appropriated by the Latins (later to become the Romans) who combined it with notable Etruscan characters including the letters “F” and “S”. Although ancient Latin omitted G, J, V (or U)*, W, Y and Z, by about the third century, the Roman alphabet looked very similar to our modern English, containing every letter except J, U (or V)* and W.
[*V and U have a complicated shared history. Both were used throughout the Middle Ages, although they were considered a single letter until quite recently.]
Old English
The history of writing in Britain begins with the Anglo-Saxons in the fifth century AD. With ties to Scandinavia and other North Seas cultures, ancient Anglo-Saxon writing, called futhorc, was a runic language. Flexible, new runes were routinely added such that, although it first appeared in England with 26 characters, by the time of its demise (by the 11th century AD), it had 33.
In the seventh century AD, the Latin alphabet introduced by Christian missionaries had begun to take hold. By 1011, a formal list of the Old English alphabet was made and included all of our present letters except J, U (or V)* and W. The ampersand and five uniquely English letters, designated ond, wynn, thorn, eth andash, were included.
As far from Modern English as Public Enemy, Old English continues to be taught in high schools and colleges when our young people are forced to grapple with things like Beowulf (translated):
HWÆT, WE GAR-DEna in geardagum, 
þeodcyninga þrym gefrunon, 
hu ða æþelingas ellen fremedon! 
oft Scyld Scefing sceaþena þreatum, 
monegum mægþum meodosetla ofteah, 
egsode eorlas, syððanærest wearð
feasceaft funden; he þæs frofre gebad,
weox under wolcnum weorðmyndum þah,
oð þæt him æghwylc ymbsittendra
ofer hronrade hyran scolde, 
gomban gyldan; þæt wæs god cyning! 
Ðæm eafera wæs æfter cenned 
geong in geardum, þone God sende 
folce to frofre; fyrenðearfe ongeat, 
þe hie ær drugon aldorlease 
lange hwile; him þæs Liffrea, 
wuldres Wealdend woroldare forgeaf, 
Beowulf wæs breme — blæd wide sprang— 
Scyldes eafera Scedelandum in. 
Swa sceal geong guma gode gewyrcean, 
fromum feohgiftumon fæder bearme . . .
Middle English
Shortly after the Old English alphabet was first set down, the Normans invaded (1066 AD). English as a language was relegated primarily to the low born, with the nobility, clergy and scholars speaking and/or writing in Norman or Latin.
By the 13th century when writing in English began to become more prominent again, the language reflected two centuries of Norman rule. The Old English letters thorn and eth were replaced by “th”; wynneventually became u-u or “w”; and the other English letters were discarded.
This form of the language, called Middle English, while still difficult at times, is comprehensible to the modern English reader. Recall Geoffrey Chaucer’s Wife of Bath from Canterbury Tales (translated):
Experience, though noon auctoritee
Were in this world, were right ynogh to me
To speke of wo that is in marriage;
For, lordynges, sith I twelf yeer was of age
Thonked be God, that is eterne on lyve,
Housebondes at chirche-dore I have had five-
For I so ofte have ywedded bee-
And alle were worthy men in hir degree.
But me was toold, certeyn, nat longe agoon is,
That sith that Crist ne wente nevere but onis
To weddyng in the Cane of Galilee,
That by the same ensample, taughte he me,
That I ne sholde wedded be but ones.
Herkne eek, lo, which a sharp word for the nones,
Modern English 
With the introduction of the printing press (invented by Johann Gutenberg in 1448) to Great Britain in the mid 15th century by William Caxton, English became more standardized and modern English appeared. Sometime in the mid-16th century, V and U were split into two letters, with U becoming the vowel, and V, the consonant. In 1604, Robert Cawdrey published the first English dictionary, the Table Alphabeticall, and about this time, J was added to create the modern English alphabet we know today.  And the rest, as they say, is history.
    Bonus Facts:
    • According to the United Nations Educational Scientific and Cultural Organization (UNESCO), Arabic, Bengali, English, French, German, Hindi, Japanese, Mandarin Chinese, Portuguese, Russian and Spanish each have at least 100 million speakers. These account for 51% of the population of the world. The remaining 49% speak any of the remaining 6000+ languages, with most sharing a mother tongue with only a tiny percentage of the world’s population.
    • Most of the world’s languages (33% or 2197) are found in Asia followed closely by 30% coming from Africa (2058). The people of the Pacific and the Americas, combined, use 34% (2324) languages, while Europe, with its 230 languages, accounts for only 3% of the total number of languages used across the globe. 
    TIFO

    Viz Bits

    047_04102014_13-37

    Not Just Celtic

    Mental Floss
    IMAGE CREDIT: 
    DAVIN DE KERGOMMEAUX
    Despite its image as being tasty with Coke or ginger ale, Canadian whisky is in the middle of a resurgence. Craft distillers are popping up left and right, and larger brands are introducing new programs and innovations. To give you a taste of the spirit, we’ve put together seven things you might not know about it.
    1. All Canadian whisky can be labeled rye. According to Canadian Food and Drug Regulations, a product must “possess the aroma, taste, and character of Canadian whisky” to be labeled Canadian whisky, rye whisky or Canadian rye whisky. Within Canada, they’re synonymous. For about 200 years, Canadian whisky producers have been using rye to make their product more complex. This practice was established more than 150 years before the U.S. required 51 percent rye content to be called rye.
    2. Prohibition didn’t make Canadian whisky popular in the U.S.—the Civil War did.Many of the whiskey distilleries in the South were either abandoned or destroyed during Civil War battles. Since troops used whiskey as an anesthetic, they turned to imported Canadian whisky to fill the gap when their stores dried up.
    3. 70 percent of Canadian whisky is exported to the U.S.
    4. Canada was the first country to legislate an age requirement for whisky. In 1887, Canada passed a law that required a spirit be aged for at least one year in wood to be called whisky. Great Britain was 25 years behind.
    5. With few exceptions, Canadian whisky is blended after distillation. Instead of combining the grains in a mash bill before distillation, each grain is distilled separately and later blended. Therefore, the most important figure in a Canadian whisky distillery holds the title of master blender rather than master distiller.
    6. During its infancy, Canadian whisky was made mostly from wheat. Canada had an abundance of wheat, so settlers used it to distill their whisky. It wasn’t until German and Dutch immigrants wanted more flavorful whisky that rye was added, but this style quickly became so popular that wheat whisky most disappeared.
    7. From 1865-2010, Canadian whisky was the best-selling whisky in the U.S. As of 2010, bourbon outsold Canadian whisky in the U.S., but Canadian whisky is still the best-selling whisky in all of North America.

    Hairy Stuff

    In Life & Death- 2

    6
    The Saudi bridegroom who left his wife on their wedding night

    The Saudi bridegroom who left his wife on their wedding night
    A Saudi bridegroom didn't wait to consummate his marriage on his wedding night before deciding to call it quits with his bride, according to Muslim cleric Sheikh Ghazi Bin Abdul Aziz al-Shammari. 

    The anonymous groom found a series of photos of his wife — in what were described as “intimate circumstances” — sent to him by her ex-lover. It seems the bride's ex was unhappy that she had chosen someone else, and decided that he would try to stop the wedding. The jilted Romeo went hi-tech and placed a memory stick with the compromising pics in a bouquet of flowers. He then attached a note for the groom suggesting he look inside the flowers and open the memory stick.

    The cleric said, “The groom came to see me the next day, and he was under strong emotional trauma. It was truly the shock of his life, and he could notbear thescandal.” (Source | Photo)



    7
    The groom who died after saying "I do"

    The groom who died after saying 'I do'
    Not much is known about this couple, but their union lasted only a few seconds, per an article in the New London, Connecticut newspaper The Day, reported in April 1967. 

    Manila resident Ramon Cusi, 65, dropped dead shortly after saying "I do" to bride Esperanza Manapat, 45, who shrieked and fainted. The union was the groom's second and unfortunately for the bride, her first. (Photo)



    8
    The actress whose marriage was annulled because she was already married

    The actress whose marriage was annulled because she was already married
    Hungarian actress and 50s bombshell Zsa Zsa Gabor was married a whopping nine times, and even wrote a book on the subject. How to Catch a Man, How to Keep a Man and How to Get Rid of a Man was published when her marriages totaled just five. 

    Gabor indeed put her money where her mouth was when she caught, married and ditched husband number 9, Felipe de Alba. She married de Alba on a yacht off Puerto Vallarta in early April 1983, but a day later, the marriage was annulled because her divorce from former husband was not final. 

    Gabor later cancelled a second wedding with De Alba, planned for July of that year. “He bored me,” says Gabor. “He's a playboy and I'm a hard-working actress.” (Source 1 | Source 2)



    9
    The silent film actress who locked her husband out of the honeymoon suite

    The silent film actress who locked her husband out of the honeymoon suite
    In 1919, silent film actress Jean Acker and then-struggling actor Rudolph Valentino met at a party and began a two-month courtship. They married on November 6 of that year. Almost immediately (on the same day, in fact), the bride quickly had regrets and locked Valentino out of their hotel bedroom on their wedding night – six hours after the ceremony. The marriage was never consummated.

    Acker is said to have been a member "the sewing circles," a group of actors who were forced to conceal the fact that they were lesbian, bisexual, and romantically and sexually attracted to women, thus living secret lives. 

    Valentino was angry with Acker for years, but the two mended fences before his death in 1926. Acker even wrote a popular song about him soon after he died called "We Will Meet at the End of the Trail." (Source | Photo)